Got three books from Booksale yesterday (all of these, previously owned). I just realized how long it has been since I last finished reading a book. I thought it’d be my read for the month.
Monkey Business by Wight, Hager, and Tyink (2007); Page after Page by Seller (2005); and 4 Blondes by Bushnell.
I never thought I’d dread (and hate) an exclamation point this much.
An exclamation point with the airport signal is not a good thing. Frustration kept me company these past two weeks. “Alert: No Internet Connection” greeted me every time I attempted to connect through wifi.
I suffered for two weeks. And then this afternoon, it just connected. I don’t know what I did (because I followed a LOT of suggestions on how to address this unit’s airport problem.) It just connected.
Disbelief, how could it be possible? How can Apple fail me? The sarcastic voice inside answered flatly, “Because… Steve Jobs is a mere mortal? And Apple is a brand. It’s not perfection.”
I’ve been having problems with this unit. The cause, I could not yet determine. Same case with the solution. In all Apple’s confidence in it’s products – the company has disappointing customer service.
Before this experience, I saw the brand as something incapable of malfunction or discomfort for their customers. Now, it’s not different from other companies. As they focus in smugly releasing more products, I just hope they develop their customer service globally.
So I focus on the little things I’ve devised to make me feel productive whenever I suck at work. That involves not meeting a deadline, passing a substandard output, or simply surviving a bad day at work. The little things that make me feel productive include keeping a journal (hopefully an entry is written before the days ends – that means something did happen to that day), this blog (to maintain the illusion that I can commit to something long-term), the jog (see entry for “this blog”), among others (for all the failed attempts… et cetera).
January ends with the completion of another journal. It took two months to fill the pages. A few stray entries in other notebooks deducted and this notebook was my life in the past two months.
Highlights of the entries include the eternally pathetic tired state, acceptance and rejection, and dealing with work backlog. How’s that for a summary? That’s the condensed version of about a hundred pages of 6×6-inch ruled sheets completed in two months.
If I haven’t established it at this point, let me. I’m no social person. I’m never at ease with getting to know people even if it’s about work. Given those, I realized how desperate my colleague was in finding people to join him and the guest for dinner. It has been him and the guest all the time – two days, I guess. Perhaps, he’d ran out of stories and is in desperate need of help. Notice I’ve used the word desperate twice already.
Blame it on kindness, or perhaps the free dinner? or simply pity for the colleague? I was in. We got another colleague to join us and we made our way to dinner.
I wasn’t as bad as I thought it would be. There were a lot of things to talk about – mostly thesis writing. So we asked for advise in writing our own manuscripts, we asked about how the guest found the Philippines so far, and then the conversation continued.
I honestly don’t know how we got through dinner and maintained the conversation. I had a good time – to my surprise. Perhaps I’m not as socially incapacitated as I thought – okay, that’s something that may be debunked by a future entry.
It’s just Thursday. Here I was thinking it was Friday already. I’m still working on completing the daily blog challenge. Problem is, as I was completing the entries for last week, I forgot that I should also be posting entries for this week. It would be nice to post something on schedule.
Finally, I was able to deliver a lecture from the ebooks I got. I’ve been reading self-help writing books for the lectures I have long wanted to prepare and deliver. And finally, this afternoon, I somehow managed to start the series of lectures. I just hope, the students could get something from the lecture (aside from entries in their notebooks.)
It’s a dream to spend the day reading writing/journalism books, preparing lectures, and designing class activities – without the backlog guilt or thinking about all the things I should be and/or will be doing. That would be ideal. Life isn’t.
All these books, I just wished I had read them while I was in College. It would have helped a lot. Students don’t usually search the net for academic books and read them. I was still a student then. Does one really have t age before s/he learns to appreciate books?
It allows me to go back through time. Take a peak at what the day was like. I’ve got this problem with storing details. While a friend seems to have no problem with details, especially dates, I can never store the information – no matter how important the may have been.
Lately, I’ve been depending on journal entries more and more. And from what I ave written, my day’s goal is noticeably more focused on getting work tasks done. It’s seldom that I get to find entries that required some contemplation, perhaps entries requiring deeper thought, and may be entries that required more time to develop?
Problem is, even if I do keep the habit of the daily post here, the problem would be the content. I’m more concerned if there’s even any sense to what I’m been writing about anymore. Will all these matter to me if and when I do re-read this entries sometime in the future? Will all the have some sense for the future me who’ll be reading this? Will it have some depth? Or will I be just laughing at myself for all these nonsensical waste of letters?
Take this as the expected and occasional doubt that bug me. At a time when I’m struggling to keep up with the challenge of writing – anything – and coming up with something to post, I just can resist scrapping everything and just giving up. Doubting the reason why I even started this is the easiest way to stop and give up.
But then, that would just be too easy – even for me. So on with the pages, it is. After all, I never promised I’d be offering entries with depth and sense on a daily basis. I promised daily entries. I’m struggling with that. The depth and the sense, that I cannot force. But I do hope by end of 2011, I could read some entries with those.
Come December 31st of 2011 and we’ll see.
- Journal Entry – Growing (gsamanifesto.wordpress.com)
- Journal Entries – Strength (journalingarts.wordpress.com)
- Keeping A Journal: Making Sense Out Of Nonsense (havecoffeewillwrite.wordpress.com)
- Writing about writing. (squek.wordpress.com)