the urge

I left the office to brave the two-hour travel to the metropolis with no intention of purchasing anything. It was my sister’s graduation. She had completed her six(?)-month-training. My other sister and I, were to represent the family in this special day.

I arrived early at the meeting area so I went inside the mall(?) to pass time. The shoe store had a sale (which store doesn’t?). Tried a few pairs. The one I liked had scratches on the leather covered by a white paint(?). It wasn’t worth the price cut. But it did leave me wanting a new pair of shoes. Most of the trip to Manila, I computing my (now nonexistent) savings. I got off the bus with the decision that if I find a really good pair, I’d buy it.

I returned half a day later with a new pair of shoes. I remember my sister asking “Did you plan on buying a new one?” Guiltily, I thought “not since an hour ago”. I seem to have a lot of moments like this one, especially this year. I’m worried.

In hindsight, I really did need a new pair of shoes. And, it was of good quality. Or maybe, this is just me justifying a recent purchase. I know I’ll spend the rest of the week recomputing my budget (which, I never really follow). But, I been in this situation before (earlier this year). I seem to have recovered quickly. And I really did need a new pair. Had I bought a pair of rubber shoes, now that would have been unnecessary.

Denial, that’s the stage I am in right now. In a few days, I’ll be in my pancit canton-siomai-Sulyaw diet. Pancit canton for breakfast, siomai meal for lunch, and a rice meal from Sulyaw for dinner 😀

 

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